Augustus Caesar Salad

My husband and kids have been gone to the beach all week, so I had to go to the store to buy some essential groceries. (All of the casseroles Mark made me for the week are gone– almost as if they had never been….)

Staples: I went to Brookshires to limit my chances of finding the ice cream. Turns out it was my lucky day.

Staples: I went to Brookshires to limit my chances of finding this flavor ice cream. Turns out it was my lucky day– they had the ice cream, chocolate covered almonds, and praline pecans. What? Nuts are paleo, man.

I saw a guy pushing a buggy, oblivious to the fact that his daughter was busy gnawing on the seat back, ingesting every noxious germ ever known to mankind.  A woman, possibly the mother, followed the prescribed 10 paces behind, and was busy typing on her phone. I hope she was submitting an online payment to her health insurance company. But, she was probably surfing Tinder Tattoo.

August is finally here!! Says no one ever. Except for maybe the first Emperor of the Roman Empire who has a month AND a salad named after him.

O.M.G. @Ray Alford

O.M.G. @Ray Alford

I wonder if it ever gets over 100 degrees in Rome? Or was that the point? If you own the baddest, hottest month, then you’re the baddest, hottest mammajamma around? Of course, the whole salad business counteracts the “I battled Cleopatra and won” tough guy image.

When I become Dictator of the Free World, my first order of business will be to banish August.  It will cease to be.  The biggest contributor to my campaign will get naming rights. The 1st of Northropp Gruman has a nice ring to it, don’t you think?

But, that’s silly. Unlimited campaign contributions won’t have any negative consequences. Our elected officials are superior beings and won’t succumb to the influence of large donors.

A picture's worth a 1,000 words.

A picture’s worth a 1,000 words.

In other news– only 60 more days until October.  Let the countdown begin!

About Laura Alford, PhD

I'm a recent graduate of LSU (PhD in Accounting). In addition to academic research, I also write fiction on Tuesday nights with the Asilomar Writers.
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